Date Rape?

This is the best shit thingy i've read today.. ahahah some guy who is afraid his daughter wud get raped in a date he made this form for the guys who will date his daughter to fill omg its teh lulz... here it goes..
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I love girls, and I wished i had 3 more daughters.

And I would named them

"Charmaine ".... she will be charming and beautiful....
" Dewi".......and hope that she will be a tall and beautiful goddess.....
" Grace"...and she will grow up gracefully and beautifully.

I would be a damned proud father !

But then again I wouldn't be able to sleep peacefully, knowing that all those hot-blooded young punks are waiting in front of my house , waiting to date and "ravage" my beautiful and vivacious young daughters.

So I have thought of a way how to protect them when all those suitors comes a-calling....hehehe

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APPLICATION TO DATE MY DAUGHTER


Full Name ................................

Date of Birth ............................

What is your IQ...........................

Home Address ............................................................................................................

1. are you staying with your parents? ........yes or no

2. are they your REAL parents ?...............yes or no

3. are your parents ONE male, One female?.....yes or no

In 30 words , please explain :

4.What does the word "LATE" mean to you?
.......................................................

5.What do the words, " Don't touch my daughter" mean to you ? ......................................................

6.What does the word "Pre-marital sex " mean to you? .....................................................

7.Religion ( do you have a religion? )............

8.When would be the best time for me to interview : a) your father & mother

b) your priest/pastor/imam/guruji

c) your ex-girlfriend

Answer the following questions freely and completely honestly.

9.All Answers are Confidential (that means I will not tell anyone. SWEAR ! )

a. If I were shot, the last place on my body I would want to be wounded is ..........................

b. If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my .................................

c. If I were to be murdered, the best way I prefer to die is ..................................

e. When I meet a girl, the first thing I notice about her is .....................................

** Note:if the answer to Question "e" begins with T or A...you are dead !!

10.What do you want to be IF you grow up (after dating my daughter) ?

I swear that all information supplied above is true and correct to the best of my knowledge, under penalty of death, a severe beating, dismemberment, torture, crucifixion and electrocution.

Any penalty will be decided at the whim of the father ( ME !! ) of the girl that you will be dating.


Signature .......................... Date...........

Witnessed by .....................(preferably a priest/pastor/imam/guruji)


Note: This application will be considered incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a copy of birth certificate, copy of university degree ( Distinction), your parents wedding photo and a current FULL BODY medical report from your doctor.

Please allow two (2) to four (4) years for processing this application.

You will be contacted in writing if your application is approved.

Meantime DO NOT attempt to call, sms, MSN or Facebook my daughter during this 2 to 4 years.

If your application is rejected, please make quick arrangements to move overseas.


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